The Importance of Acknowledging Our Brokenness
Grief has a way of breaking us in ways we never imagined. When my world shattered with the loss of my daughter, I found myself trying to stay strong, to hold it all together. But over time, I’ve come to realize that in trying to be strong, I was denying myself a crucial part of the healing process: acknowledging my brokenness.
In the midst of deep sorrow, it’s natural to want to avoid the pain. We may distract ourselves, bury our emotions, or put on a brave face for the world. Society often praises those who seem to “bounce back” quickly, but grief doesn’t work that way. In reality, true healing begins not when we avoid our brokenness, but when we allow ourselves to sit with it, feel it, and acknowledge it.
Why It’s So Hard to Admit We’re Broken
Admitting that we are broken feels vulnerable. It can feel like we’re saying we’ve failed or that we’re weak. But being broken by grief isn’t a sign of failure—it’s a testament to how deeply we love. Loss, especially the loss of a child, shakes the very foundation of who we are. And it’s okay to admit that we are not okay.
I’ve had moments where I felt like I couldn’t go on, and it was only when I let myself acknowledge that brokenness that I could begin to heal. When I stopped pretending to be strong and allowed myself to grieve fully, I discovered that there is strength in vulnerability.
Healing Through Acknowledgment
Acknowledging our brokenness doesn’t mean we stay in that place forever. In fact, it’s the first step toward healing. By confronting our pain head-on, we give ourselves permission to mourn. This is crucial because grief needs space to breathe. It can’t be pushed aside or ignored indefinitely.
When we acknowledge that we are shattered, we open the door for God to step into those broken spaces. It is in these moments of deep vulnerability that we allow His grace to enter our lives, offering comfort, hope, and eventually, the strength to rebuild.
Giving Others Permission to Be Broken Too
Another beautiful thing about acknowledging our own brokenness is that it gives others permission to do the same. In sharing my story on the Shattered episode of my podcast, I wanted to show other grieving parents that it’s okay to not have it all together. It’s okay to feel like you’re falling apart. When we are honest about our struggles, we create a space for others to be vulnerable too, and in that shared brokenness, there is deep healing.
We live in a world that constantly encourages us to “move on” and “be strong,” but I believe the real strength comes from facing our brokenness, not running from it. Only then can we begin to rebuild—not into the same people we were before, but into something new, something shaped by our love, loss, and hope.
So, if you’re feeling shattered today, I want to encourage you: it’s okay to not be okay. Let yourself grieve, let yourself feel the weight of the broken pieces. In time, those pieces will form a new picture, a different kind of wholeness, one that honors both your love and your loss.
You are not alone in this journey. Together, we can find hope and healing, even in our brokenness.
